


Push and Pull

by SoftBoyApollo



Series: Karl Urban Thirst [1]
Category: Almost Human (TV)
Genre: Anger Management, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, John's puppy eyes, M/M, Non-Graphic Violence, Swearing, Trauma, no beta we die like men, reader is thirsty af at one point but look at this man do we blame the reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:55:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25823257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoftBoyApollo/pseuds/SoftBoyApollo
Summary: John has been distant ever since you started dating. You’ve tried to endure it in the hopes of it getting better, but, unfortunately, communication seems necessary to solve problems. John does not like to talk about his feelings tho.
Relationships: John Kennex/Reader, John Kennex/You
Series: Karl Urban Thirst [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1873687
Kudos: 5





	Push and Pull

**Author's Note:**

> You can make requests on my tumblr mlm-writer.tumblr.com

“Professor.” You looked away from the screen you have been doing data analyses at. The last of your fellow forensic scientists stood at the door with her coat on. “I cleaned up as much as I could. Please don’t forget to go home yourself.” You smiled at her and reassured her you would go home before midnight. The look in her eyes made the same inquiry as most of your colleagues had, but she did not ask why you were working so much.

At this point you did not even write down the extra hours, afraid that some MX might kick you out by five if you did. Your notes started to get sloppy, but you felt like it was worth it when you heard a knock on the door. Without waiting for an answer, it opened and your boyfriend stepped inside. “Hey, have you eaten yet?” You shook your head and frantically opened the file with your notes. 

“No, but I have some interesting findings about the samples from your case this morning.” It sent you down a rabbit hole of connecting dots and by the time you started mentally dozing off, you were so close to a breakthrough. Frustration filled your body as you tried to force your brain to have just one more useful thought. 

A kiss landed on your temple. “Let’s continue tomorrow. I am tired and hungry.” You let out a sleepy chuckle as you closed up for today. You kept a professional distance from John as you both exited the building in silence and walked towards the car. The moment you sat down, you started napping for just those few minutes you knew it took to get to John’s favourite noodle place. 

A soft shake woke you from your dreamless slumber. “Hey, you’ve been working too hard lately.” You scoffed and brushed it off. You knew, but you felt like John had been distancing himself ever since you two were officially a thing. Before that he was always more open and vulnerable around you than with other people, but now you felt like he was more open towards anyone but you. The only way to get him to let loose, was to work on a case with him, so you gave that little extra to spend more time with him as soon and as much as possible. 

“You must be really tired. Usually, you chat the ears off my head.” You looked up from your bowl of steaming noodles and forced a smile on your face. 

“Well, I guess working more makes me better company then,” you replied without thinking about it. You did not notice the shocked look on your boyfriend’s face, until he put a hand on your wrist. 

“I like it when you chat my ears off my head, so get some more rest, ok? You don’t have to do everything on your own. Just let your colleagues help you more.” You pull your hand away, pouting as you continue eating. 

The idea of someone else talking John through the evidence fuelled a jealousy that had been vestering in your chest for weeks now. “Take me home with you tomorrow.” John choked on his noodles. Heads turned towards him as he coughed and reached for his beer. He chugged half of it before looking at you again like he misheard you. “You heard me. We need to talk and I am too tired right now.” 

John was quiet for a moment. The air was tense as you two ate. Your bowl was close to empty when you heard his voice again. “If you want to break up with me, you can just say it now.” His voice was small and if you were not so overworked, tired and frustrated, you would have hugged him and reassured him that you loved him so much and that breaking up was the opposite of what you wanted. However, you were overworked, tired and frustrated, so that was not happening. 

You slammed your spoon into the bowl and stood up. “If you never wanted to be in a relationship with me in the first place, then you should just have said no when I asked you to be my boyfriend,” you gritted through your teeth to make as less of a scene as possible. “I’m gonna take a cab home.” Something inside you hoped he would come after you, like men did in movies, but your name stayed uncalled as you waited in the cold night air for a cab to pass you by. 

The next day, your head was even less in the game. You kept making typos, to the point someone gently suggested you took a break. Their tone betrayed how foul your mood had been and you caved. It was getting better, until a familiar face joined you. “There you are, professor,” he said upon arrival, putting way too much emphasis on ‘professor’, “I was hoping you could fill me on your findings on yesterday’s evidence.” You did not like his tone at all. Your eyes almost rolled out of their sockets as you stood up and walked past him. He followed you to your desk, keeping more distance than he usually would. 

“Here,” you hissed as you pushed the file folder into his hands, “your culprit is sprinkling Marigold pollen around like Hansel and Gretel. Dorian knows how to scan for it. You’ll have them by lunch.” You gave him a passive aggressive pat on the arm, before hopping off your desk and walking away. You caught a scrutinizing gaze from your boyfriend, but you pulled an uno reverse card on that. Maybe you were being immature, but you were convinced you had enough reason to. 

If you were not still angry at John, you would’ve thought him dragging the suspect into the precinct before lunch was really hot. You still thought it was hot, but you were too angry to admit that to yourself. You bit the inside of your cheek when you saw him sit the suspect down by force, before turning the glass translucent, blurring the inside.  
On the plus side, having a case finished so easily with little issues, put John in a good mood. You were calmed down as well by the time it was time to clock out. You got a message at two past five. It was from John, asking you to have Chinese take-out at his place tonight. You shot him a message back, something long enough to show him you were in a better mood than that morning. 

While getting the food, it was easy to slip into conversation about the case he solved today. Work-talk turned into reminiscing, talking about people, laughing a little. However, when the door of his apartment closed behind you, it felt so cut-off from the rest of the world and the air between you became thick with the masks you both have the tendency to put on in public. Eating the food had gotten way more awkward than getting the food. With no one to convince you were two happily dating adults, there was uncertainty of how much you had to fool yourselves everything was fine. 

Both of you knew there was need for serious talk, for heart-to-heart conversations about something other than work. “When the captain found out about us,” you started out of nowhere, because it had to start somehow, “she told me to be patient with you, because you had some bad experiences with your ex.” You could see tension growing in his shoulders. “John, we’ve been dating for three months now. Don’t you think it is time you tell me at least a little about your ex? I don’t need the details, but…”

“No.”

You had not even finished speaking. John was already standing up and gathering the dirty plates, turning his back towards you to toss them in the sink. “Why?” You put your hands on your hips, hoping for a very good answer. 

“What happened with her is none of your business,” he grunted as he aggressively started putting everything in the dishwasher, not leaving everything to solidify for once. 

“Well I think it is,” you replied, wanting for him to turn around, but you were not going to beg to see his face. 

“And I think not. What does she have to do with you?”

You walked around the table and stood next to him. Your proximate forced him to at least give you a short glance. Your face was hard, but your voice was fraying at the edges. “Well maybe it will help me understand why you have been such a lousy boyfriend.” You did not mean that, but you felt like you did. 

“I told you yesterday to not keep fucking around if you just want to break up with me,” he replied, not giving in to telling you anything. 

“I do not want to break up with you, but if you’re just gonna prefer talking to anyone but me, what is the point of being in a relationship with you?” You tilted your head, trying to get a look at his face, but you flinched away as he tossed a glass back into the sink with unnecessary force. It was a surprisingly sturdy glass that did not shatter. You backed away, survival instinct winning. John never gave the vibe of someone who would hurt you. He may have been rough in the bedroom, but never angry and to be honest, angry John scared you. 

You swallowed thickly, hoping he would say something, but instead he just tossed the towel lying on the counter across the room. You backed away further, tensing up at the frustrated growl he let out. You never had seen him like this. He was scarier now than when he was yelling at an MX, scarier than when he shot a suspect that returned to the crime scene, scarier than when he came back from the field with bruises and a suspect in a worse state than him. 

“Just say it already,” he roared, “there is no point of being with me, so just end it!” Your heart hammered in your chest, but you heard his desperation. He seemed angry, but his voice betrayed the direction of his anger was not you, but himself. 

“End it yourself if you want us to break up so bad,” you replied, sounding more angry than you meant to, voice raised in defence.

“I don’t want to!”  
“Then what the fuck is your problem?”  
“I’m scared!”

He looked up with horror on his face, seemingly shocked by his own words. “Goddammit, I’m a mess,” he nearly inaudibly muttered as he walked over to the couch with limp limbs. You crossed your arms, looking at him as you stayed in place. John was never keen on talking, but your silence forced him to. “My ex… she stabbed me in the back,” he admitted, but the sentence did not sound like it was finished. 

“And now you’re scared I will too, so the moment we get together you get cold feet about how much you can trust me?” He did not nod or hum, but the defensive posture was confirmation enough. “Well… I passed the background check when I joined the force.” He let out a bitter chuckle, before looking at you. He held his hand out for you with puppy eyes you could not resist. You sighed and walked over. “I assume it was more than cheating?” You asked, trying to be direct without being overly specific. Your fingers touched his rough hand and he took a firm grasp of yours. He pulled, but let you sit down next to him on your own terms. 

“Oh I wish she cheated,” he tried to joke, but his tone lacked humor. John’s thumb rubbed over your hands as you sat next to each other, distance between you, bridged by your intertwined hands. “It’s not easy to explain,” he said as his eyes stayed on the connection between you two, “but I will, someday.” He looked up to you with those same puppy eyes. “Just give me time, yeah?”

You sighed, hating yourself for being such a sucker for those eyes. “Just stop avoiding me at work. I’ve been working on your cases so you would talk to me.” 

He laughed. “For real?” You felt a little stupid, but nodded anyway. “Oh.” He swallowed down another laugh. “Then I’ll try to talk to you more often, so go home earlier, sleep more and eat well.” He patted your head, a soft smile on his face. 

“Hey, those are three things in exchange for one thing. I don’t think that’s fair.” You saw the edges of his mouth tug up against his will. 

“Ok fine, what other demands do you have?” He questioned, humor returning.


End file.
